Days that I will not want it to come...

 
This week...

Monday - was past because it was yesterday. Presentation was fine!!!

Wednesday - WTH...If I see you and I will be who I am.. Smile gracefully (hope I can do it, pray for me)

Saturday - Oh no... But will have a whole loads of support from my fellow Lasallians =)

The road seems longer

 
I remembered that day.

Is still so fresh in my mind.

That particular day was raining like cats and dogs.

I was driving home after classes.

I was crying tremendously just like the weather.

The route seems so long...



It has been weeks since then.

I still feels the same whenever it is raining heavily while I am driving.

The same route home after class and the same weather.

The journey home seems tougher and longer.

I wonder...

COmforts, Advices and Someone - I need

I am trying my best.

I force myself to the max till it suffocates me.

I could not bear the suffocating.

I keep it to myself.

But, when I can't stand it...

I will share it out to my closests.

Some will give advice.

Don't force yourself.


Don't be too harsh to yourself.


Don't worry yourself too much.


Can't be denied that you felt that way.


It will be better as time goes by.

Some will just listen.

Be strong.

You deserve someone better. 

You're better off without him. 

You can do it.

We love you.

All I need are the comforts, advices and someone be there to listen.

I MISS YOU

=(

:'(

sobz sobz

How are you?

When you meet someone, first thing will be this question.

The answer will always be - I am fine, thank you.

I still give that answer lately. 

Is an Honest Mistake.

The truth is that I am not fine at all.

How am I suppose to tell people that I am having hard times?

I will just answer that I am fine.

A delightful smile.

I smiled pleasantly and I may looked happy.

Do that smile really resemble my situation.

I can certainly say no. 

I smile but I am not happy. 

Looks can be deceiving.

The true feeling reveals.

I am so down.

The pain hurts and is killing me tenderly.

I am dying inside.

I am not as fine as my smile tells you. 

Hard to hold back...

The night when it's all over was the only time I cried tremendously. It seems like the whole world came to an end. I was so lost but I went to bed. Tears came filling my closed eyes when was in bed, I was soon asleep. The next day, the very silly me to cry in public as I can hold back my tears everytime. It was the same this time that I did it in college. I was acting to be strong and attentive. However, I can't stop the tears falling down my face silently. I stopped after sometime. Then, I told myself not to shed a single drop of tear anymore. I didn't, ever since till today when I was facebooking with two friends whose hearts were broken too. I just could not hold back my tears. I am forcing myself too hard to not think. Not let it bother me, not to let it hurt me, not to cry. Which ended up even worst. I am tired of it and I cried once again. I feel much better after that but I am still feeling emotional. I realise that I am not over him. I do miss him a lot. I still want to care for him. 

I miss you much =(

sobz sobz sobz

disturbed =(

Perhaps, I shouldn't even bother looking any event that you will be attending. It doesn't matters me at all no matter where those events are held and you will be attending all of them. However, not this particular event. Sigh...it will be held at my college, directly the block where my classes are. Why must it be there and why must it be this time??? Why why why why WHY??

If we are to bump into each other on that day, how will I react. I am thinking how will I feel there and then. Am I able to control my feelings? Do I have the courage to see you? I wonder if you will treat me as a friend of yours. If you are, will you greet me, will you talk to me, will you give me a hug...? All the uncertainties. The question marks keep me pondering!

I am just so naive to allow all these to bother me. It disturbed me once I saw the venue of the event. I feel like skipping class just for that day. But, why shall I, just because he will be there. Face the reality. I must not let him know that I am not completely over him. I have to show him that I will be able to survive without him. I certainly need to be happy. Nevertheless, I am feeling emotional now. It disturbes me from today till that day comes.

sobs...sobs..sobs...   =(

Off you go, Get lost...

 
Bye bye March 2010


Shoo...shoo...shoo...


Go away...far far away..


Don't wanna see you anymore


Will never miss you, March 2010


All the fools stay far away


Goodbye, March


April Fool is here


April will be a better month


LOADS more to come =)